Mishkat al-Masabih

It pertains to the sunna that when a man who has a wife marries a virgin he should stay with her for seven nights and then divide the time between them, but if he marries a woman who has been previously married he should stay with her three nights and then divide his time between his wives. Abu (Qilaba remarked that if he wished he could say that Anas traced it to the Prophet. (Bukhari and Muslim.)

Abu Bakr b. ‘Abd ar-Rahman told that when God’s Messenger married Umm Salama he said to her in the morning, “You are not being humbled in my estimation. If you wish I shall stay with you seven nights as I did with my other wives, but if you wish I shall stay three and then visit my wives in turn.” She replied, “Stay three nights.” In a version he said, “The virgin gets seven nights and the woman who has had a previous husband three.” Muslim transmitted it.

‘A’isha told that the Prophet used to divide his time among his wives equally and say, “O God, this is my division concerning what I possess, so do not blame me concerning what Thou possessest and I do not.” Tirmidhi, Abu Dawud, Nasa’i, Ibn Majah and Darimi transmitted it.

Abu Huraira reported the Prophet as saying, “When a man has two wives and does not treat them equally he will come on the day of resurrection with a side hanging down.” Tirmidhi, Abu Dawud, Nasa’i, Ibn Majah and Darimi transmitted it.

‘Ata’ told that when they were with Ibn ‘Abbas at Maimuna’s funeral in Sarif he said, “This is God’s Messenger’s wife, so when you lift her bier do not shake her or disturb her, but be gentle with her, for God’s Messenger had nine wives with eight of whom he shared his time, but to one of them he did not allot a share.” ‘Ata’ said they heard that the one to whom God’s Messenger did not allot a share was Safiya who was the last of them to die. She died in Medina. Razin said that someone other than ‘Ata’ declared she was Sauda, and that is sounder. She gave her day to ‘A’isha when God's Messenger intended to divorce her, saying to him, “Keep me. I have given my day to ‘A’isha. Perhaps I may be one of your wives in paradise.” (Bukhari and Muslim.)

Abu Huraira reported God's Messenger as saying, “Act kindly toward women, for they were created from a rib and the most crooked part of a rib is its top. If you attempt to straighten it you will break it, and if you leave it alone it will remain crooked; so act kindly towards women.” (Bukhari and Muslim.)

He reported God’s Messenger as saying, “Woman has been created from a rib and will in no way be straight for you; so if you enjoy her you will do so while crookedness remains in her; but if you attempt to straighten her you will break her, breaking her being divorcing her.” Muslim transmitted it.

He reported God’s Messenger as saying, “A believer must not hate a believing woman; if he dislikes one of her characteristics he will be pleased with another.” Muslim transmitted it.

He reported God’s Messenger as saying, “Had it not been for the B. Isra’il meat would not have gone bad, and had it not been for Eve a woman would never have acted unfaithfully towards her husband.’’ (Bukhari and Muslim.)

‘Abdallah b. Zam'a reported God’s Messenger as saying, “None of you must whip his wife as a slave is whipped and then have intercourse with her at the end of the day.” A version has, “One of you has recourse to whipping his wife as a slave is whipped and perhaps he lies with her at the end of the day.” He then gave them an exhortation about laughing when someone breaks wind, saying, “Why does one of you laugh at what he does himself?” (Bukhari and Muslim.)

I was playing with dolls in the Prophet’s house and I had companions who played with me; but when God’s Messenger entered they would withdraw from him. He would then send them to me and they would play with me. (Bukhari and Muslim.)

I swear by God that I have seen the Prophet standing at the door of my room when the Abyssinians were playing with spears in the mosque and God’s Messenger was covering me with his cloak in order that I might look over his shoulder* at their sport. He would then stand for my sake till I was the one who departed; so estimate the time a young girl eager for amusement would wait.” * Literally “between his ear and his shoulder.” (Bukhari and Muslim.)

She told that God’s Messenger said to her, “I know when you are pleased with me and when you are angry with me.” She asked how he knew that and he replied that when she was pleased with him she said, ‘'No, by Muhammad’s Lord,” but when she was angry with him she said, “No, by Abraham's Lord.” She then said, “I swear by God, Messenger of God, that that is so; it is only your name that I omit.” (Bukhari and Muslim.)

Abu Huraira reported God's Messenger as saying, “When a woman who has been called to come to her husband’s bed refuses and he spends the night angry, the angels curse her till the morning.” In a version by both of them he said, “By Him in whose hand my soul is, if any woman who has been called to come to her husband’s bed refuses, He who is in heaven is displeased with her till her t husband is pleased with her.” (Bukhari and Muslim.)

Asma’ told of a woman who said, “Messenger of God, I have a fellow-wife; will it be wrong for me to boast of receiving from my husband what he does not give me?” He replied, “The one who boasts of receiving what he has not been given is like him who has put on the two garments of falsehood.” (Bukhari and Muslim.)

Anas said that God’s Messenger swore he would stay away from his wives for a month. His foot being dislocated, he stayed in an upper room for twenty-nine nights and then came down; and when it was remarked to him that he has sworn to stay away for a month, he replied, “The month has twenty-nine days.”* *This is most probably with reference to the month in question, as it cannot be considered a general statement. Bukhari transmitted it.

Abu Bakr came and asked permission to go in to see the Prophet, but found the people seated at his door, none of them having been given permission. Permission was, however, given to Abu Bakr and he entered. ‘Umar then came forward, and when he had asked and had been granted permission he found the Prophet sitting sad and silent with his wives around him. He told that he decided to say something which would make the Prophet laugh, so he said, “Messenger of God, I wish you had seen the daughter of Kharija when she asked me for extra money and I got up and slapped her on the neck.” God's Messenger laughed and said, “They are around me as you see asking for extra money.” Abu Bakr then got up, went to ‘A’isha and slapped her on the neck, and ‘Umar did the same to Hafsa, both of them saying, “Are you asking God’s Messenger for what he does not possess?” They all replied, “We swear by God that we never ask God’s Messenger for anything he does not possess.” Thereafter he withdrew from them for a month or twenty-nine days. Then this verse came down, “O prophet, say to your wives ... for those who do well among you a great reward” (Al-Qur’an 33:28 f). He then went first to ‘A’isha and said, “I want to propound something to you, ‘A’isha, but wish no hasty reply before you consult your parents.” When she had asked him what it was and he had recited the verse to her she said, “Shall I consult my parents about you, Messenger of God? Nay, I choose God, His Messenger, and the final abode; but I ask you not to tell any of your wives what I have said.” He replied, “Not one of them will ask me without my informing her. God did not send me to be harsh or cause harm, but sent me to teach and make things easy.” Muslim transmitted it.

Being jealous of the women who offered themselves to God's Messenger I asked, “Does a woman offer herself?” Then when God most high sent down, “You may defer any of them you wish and take to yourself any you wish, and if you desire any you have set aside no sin is chargeable to you” (Al-Qur’an 33:51) said, “It seems to me that your Lord hastens to satisfy your desire.” (Bukhari and Muslim.)

'A'isha told that when she was with God's Messenger on a journey she raced him on foot and beat him, but when she grew she raced him and he beat her. He said, “This makes up for that beating." Abu Dawud transmitted it.

She reported God's Messenger as saying, “The best of you is he who is best to his family, and I am the best among you to my family. When one of you dies speak no ill of him." Tirmidhi and Darimi transmitted it, and Ibn Majah transmitted it up to “to my family” on the authority of Ibn ‘Abbas.

Anas reported God’s Messenger as saying, “When a woman observes the five times of prayer, fasts during Ramadan, preserves her chastity and obeys her husband, she may enter by any of the gates of paradise she wishes.”* * A way of saying nothing will prevent her from entering paradise. Abu Nu'aim transmitted it in al-Hilya.

Abu Huraira reported God’s Messenger as saying, “If I were to order anyone to prostrate himself before another, I would order a woman to prostrate herself before her husband." Tirmidhi transmitted it.

Umm Salama reported God’s Messenger as saying, “Any woman who dies when her husband is pleased with her will enter paradise." Tirmidhi transmitted it.

Talq b. ‘Ali reported God’s Messenger as saying, “When a man calls his wife to satisfy his desire she must go to him even if she is occupied at the oven.” Tirmidhi transmitted it.

Mu'adh reported the Prophet as saying that no woman annoys her husband in this world without his wife among the large-eyed maidens saying, “You must not annoy him. God curse you! He is only a passing guest with you and is about to leave you to come to us.” Tirmidhi and Ibn Majah transmitted it, Tirmidhi saying this is a gharib tradition.

“Messenger of God, what right can any wife demand of her husband?’’ He replied, “That you should give her food when you eat, clothe her when you clothe yourself, not strike her on the face, and do not revile her or separate from her except in the house” (Al-Quran 4:34). Ahmad, Abu Dawud and Ibn Majah transmitted it.

Laqit b. Sabira told that he said, “Messenger of God, I have a wife who has something in her tongue,” meaning foul speech. He told him to divorce her, but when he replied that he had a son from her and she was a companion, he said, “Give her a command (meaning give her an exhortation), and if there is any good in her she will accept it; but do not beat your wife as you would beat your young slave-girl.” Abu Dawud transmitted it.

Iyas b. ‘Abdallah reported God’s Messenger as saying, “Do not beat God’s handmaidens;” but when ‘Umar came to God’s Messenger and said, “The women have become emboldened towards their husbands,” he gave licence to beat them. Then many women went round God’s Messenger’s family complaining of their husbands, and he said, “Many women have gone round Muhammad’s family complaining of their husbands. Those are not the “best among you.” Abu Dawud, Ibn Majah and Darimi transmitted it.

Abu Huraira reported God’s Messenger as saying, “He who makes a wife disaffected towards her husband or a slave towards his master is not one of us.” Abu Dawud transmitted it.

‘A’isha reported God’s Messenger as saying, “Among the believers who show most perfect faith are those who have the best disposition, and are kindest to their families." Tirmidhi transmitted it.

Abu Huraira reported God’s Messenger as saying, “The believers who show the most perfect faith are those who have the best disposition and the best of you are those who are best to their wives.” Tirmidhi transmitted it, saying this is a hasan sahih tradition, and Abu Dawud transmitted it up to “disposition.”

'A’isha told that when God’s Messenger arrived after the expedition to Tabuk or Hunain the wind raised an end of a curtain which was placed before her storeroom, revealing some dolls which belonged to her. He asked her what this was and she replied that they were her dolls. Among them he saw a horse with wings made of rags and asked what that was that he saw among them. She told him that it was a horse, and when he asked what it was that it had on it and she replied that it had wings, he said, “A horse with wings!” She replied, “Have you not heard that Solomon had horses with wings?” She said that he laughed so heartily that she could see his back teeth. Abu Dawud transmitted it.

I went to al-Hira and saw them prostrating themselves before a satrap of theirs, so I said, “God’s Messenger has most right to have prostration made before him.” When I came to God’s Messenger I said, “I went to al-Hira and saw them prostrating themselves before a satrap of theirs, but you have most right to have people prostrating themselves before you.” He replied, “Tell me; if you were to pass my grave, would you prostrate yourself before it?” Then when I said that I would not, he replied, “None of you must do it. If I were to command anyone to make prostration before another I would command women to prostrate themselves before their husbands, because of the special right over them given to the husbands by God.” Abu Dawud transmitted it, and Ahmad transmitted it on the authority of Mu'adh b. Jabal.

‘Umar reported the Prophet as saying, “A man should not be asked about why he beat his wife.” Abu Dawud and Ibn Majah transmitted it.

“As for her statement that I make her break her fast when she is observing it, she keeps on fasting, and I am a young man who cannot contain himself.” God’s Messenger said, “A woman may fast only with her husband’s permission.”* He continued: “As for her statement that I do not pray till the sun rises; I belong to a family which has such a reputation, hardly awakening till the sun rises.” He said, “Then when you awake, Safwan, you must pray.” * This refers to fasting which is not obligatory. Abu Dawud and Ibn Majah transmitted it.

'A’isha said that once when God’s Messenger was with a number of the Emigrants and Helpers a camel came and prostrated itself before him. Thereupon his companions said, “Messenger of God, beasts and trees prostrate themselves before you, but we have most right to do so.” He replied, “Worship your Lord and honour your brother. If I were to order any one to prostrate himself before another, I would order a woman to prostrate herself before her husband; and if he were to order her to convey stones from a yellow mountain to a black one, or from a black mountain to a white one, it would be incumbent on her to do so.” Ahmad transmitted it.

a runaway slave, till he returns to his patrons and puts his hand in theirs; a woman with whom her husband is displeased; and a drunkard, till he becomes sober.” Baihaqi transmitted it in Shu'ab al-iman.

Abu Huraira told that when God’s Messenger was asked which woman was best he replied, “The one who pleases when he looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his wishes regarding her person or property by doing anything of which he disapproves.” Nasa’i and Baihaqi, in Shu'ab al-iman, transmitted it.

a thankful heart, a tongue which makes mention of God, a body which shows endurance in trial, and a wife who does not seek to be unfaithful to in her person or his property.” Baihaqi transmitted it in Shu'ab al-iman.

Ibn ‘Abbas told that the wife of Thabit b. Qais came to the Prophet and said, “Messenger of God, I do not reproach Thabit b. Qais in respect of character or religion, but I do not want to be guilty of infidelity* regarding Islam.” God’s Messenger asked her if she would give him back his garden, and when she replied that she would, he told him to accept the garden and make one declaration of divorce. * Meaning she did not like him and so was afraid she might not show him the respect due to a husband. Kufran, translated ‘infidelity’, can also mean ‘ingratitude’. Bukhari transmitted it.

'Abdallah b. ‘Umar said he divorced a wife of his while she was menstruating and that when ‘Umar mentioned the matter to God’s Messenger he became angry and said, “He must take her back and keep her till she is purified, then has another period and is purified. If it then seems good to him to divorce her he may do so when she is pure from the menstrual discharge before having intercourse with her, for that is the period of waiting which God has commanded for the divorce of women.” A version has, “Command him to take her back, then divorce her when she is pure from the menstrual discharge, or pregnant.” (Bukhari and Muslim.)

‘A’isha said that God’s Messenger gave them their choice and they chose God and His Messenger; so that was not reckoned as counting in any way to their divorce. (Bukhari and Muslim.)

One makes atonement for something he has made unlawful for himself.* You have had a good example in God’s Messenger. * i.e. something not in itself unlawful. It is treated like an oath for breaking which atonement must be made. The Prophet’s example refers to his withdrawing from his wives for a period. (Bukhari and Muslim.)

The Prophet used to spend time with Zainab daughter of Jahsh and that he once drank honey at her house, so Hafsa and she agreed that the one whom the Prophet visited first should say, “I notice that you have an odour of the gum of the mimosa.* Have you eaten some?” When he visited one of them and she said that to him he replied, “Don’t worry; I drank some honey at the house of Zainab daughter of Jahsh, but I swear that I shall not do it again. Do not tell anyone of that.” desiring to please his wives, and then there came down, “O prophet, why do you hold to be forbidden what God has made lawful for you, desiring to please your wives? (Al-Qur’an 66:1). *Maghafir; plural of Mughfur, is here used. It is the gum of a kind of mimosa called ‘urfut, the odour of which is unpleasant. (Bukhari and Muslim.)

Thauban reported God's Messenger as saying, “If any woman asks her husband for divorce without some strong reason the odour of paradise will be forbidden to her.” Ahmad, Tirmidhi, Abu Dawud, Ibn Majah and Darimi transmitted it.

Ibn ‘Umar reported the Prophet as saying, “The lawful thing which God hates most is divorce.” Abu Dawud transmitted it.

‘Ali reported the Prophet as saying, “There is no divorce before marriage, no manumission till one has possession, no continuous fasting, no orphan hood after the age of puberty, no suckling after weaning, and no silence all day up to the night”.* * Observing a complete day's silence as a religious practice is rejected. It is transmitted in Sharh as-sunna.

‘Amr b. Shu'aib, on his father’s authority, said his grandfather reported God’s Messenger as saying, “No descendant of Adam may make a vow about what he does not possess, or set free what he does not possess, or divorce what he does not possess.” Tirmidhi transmitted it, and Abu Dawud added, “or sell what he does not possess.”

Rukana b. 'Abd Yazid said he divorced his wife Suhaima absolutely and when the Prophet was informed of that he said, “I swear by God that I meant it to be only a single utterance of divorce.” God’s Messenger asked him if that was so, and when he assured him that it was, he restored her to him. Then he divorced her the second time in the time of ‘Umar and the third time in the time of ‘Uthman. Abu Dawud, Tirmidhi, Ibn Majah and Darimi transmitted it, but only Abu Dawud mentioned the second and third time (See Abu Dawud’s Sunan, Talaq, 14).

marriage, divorce and taking back a wife after a divorce which is not final.” Tirmidhi and Abu Dawud transmitted it, Tirmidhi saying this is a hasan gharib tradition.